Dis-ability or Different-ability? 6 Leadership Lessons from Those Who Are Different

40,000,000. That is about how many people in the U.S. have some type of disability. This includes people living with some form of loss in hearing, vision, cognition, walking, or self-care. Many of these men and women (and children) are truly remarkable. We often think, “What I can do to help them?” rather than “What can I learn from them?” People with disabilities have extraordinary abilities, or what I call “different-abilities.” They often have far more to offer than what you observe. Here are six lessons from those with different-abilities that each of us can apply to our life and leadership.

1. INTERDEPENDENCY

Asking for help is a sign of courage, humility, and confidence. It invites others to partner with you, and it mobilizes their gifts and talents to make you stronger and make the mission more successful. Interdependency is well defined by this popular verse from the Bible, “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.” So, consider inviting others to partner with you in a project or process.

A new way to think: “I am not helpless, but I do need some help.”

2. ADVOCACY

People with disabilities and their families quickly learn to be advocates since it is vital for their lives, and sometimes even their survival. You too can and should advocate for your ideas and even yourself. It shows that you are motivated and willing to speak up for what you believe is important. But it can be damaging when done in an obnoxious way or when it is done with far too much frequency. The best advocates do a great job at balancing listening (inquiry) with advocating.

A new way to think: “I shall not be afraid to speak up for myself and my ideas.”

3. TRANSPARENCY

Some people with disabilities have no way of hiding their limitation. For example, my daughter has repercussions from a stroke, and those are not able to be hidden. In the 2019 Inc.com article “Transparency: The New Leadership Superpower,” Jim Schleckser wrote about how transparency is growing in many areas of our society yet still lagging in leadership. Leaders sometimes fear being vulnerable. Yet, people trust and respect us more when we do not hide our limitations and when we do not withhold information. Such vulnerability lets them know we are human and have our own challenges with which we live and lead.

A new way to think: “I shall not hide my limitations – they are a part of who I am.”

4. SACRIFICIALITY

Yes, we invented this word, but you get the point. Those with disabilities have given up or lost something. Yet, so many are able to focus on what they do have more than what they do not. By facing losses, these individuals gain new opportunities, new skills, and a new voice! You can always find someone who has better resources, greater facilities, or even more talented team members. As leaders and team members, we should remember to not take for granted all that we have.

A new way new to think: “I will learn to appreciate and best utilize what I have rather than focus on what I do not.”

5. TENACITY

People with disabilities are some of the most tenacious folks you will ever meet. Leaders would do well to observe and learn. Tenacity is far more of a differentiator of effective leaders than intelligence alone. It takes perseverance to sell new ideas, overcome obstacles, and manage resistance. Just because something is hard does not mean it isn’t good. Good things are often hard. In her book Grit, Angela Duckworth noted that gritty people “demonstrate determination, resiliency, and tenacity.” Life can be hard and is seldom fair. Choose tenacity over being a victim.

A new way to think: “I shall not live like a victim just because life is hard.”

6. CREATIVITY

My daughter is a cancer and stroke survivor. At the age of 13, she lost the use of most of her left side. Yet, she learned to be right-handed instead of a lefty. She has creatively figured out ways to put a harness on her dog, open a jar, and safely cut an avocado (which I seldom do without cutting myself). Innovation most often emerges when obstacles are big and motivation is high. Creativity leads to change, and change can be uncomfortable. As a leader, when you start feeling uncomfortable, you have likely entered the lane of growth and change.

A new way to think: “There’s usually a new, albeit different, way to do what I need to do.”

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Jay Desko is the CEO of The Center Consulting Group and brings experience in the areas of organizational assessment, leadership coaching, decision-making, and strategic questioning. Jay’s degrees include an M.Ed. in Instructional Systems Design from Pennsylvania State University and a Ph.D. in Organizational Behavior and Leadership from The Union Institute.